Thank you for this piece Ms. Suzanna. I think it's the first one I read of yours, in a series of articles that I have read on narcissism.
I was able to finally let go of my female covert narcissist because of what I found here on Medium. She tried hard to get me to marry her after I initially proposed, but called off our engagement in 2016. What an even bigger mistake that would've been. I was always confused, upset, and giving her umpteen chances. I didn't understand exactly what the problem was, but when I did, I was truly lucky I didn't marry that woman. It lasted 5.5 years without me letting her move back in, and she got worse with creating chaos and being ice cold unless she wanted something from me.
She'd turn on the charm to wheel me back in, then like a light-switch, start acting like the B from hell ... not even a day later, in the end. I labeled her many things, but not until I found out how narcissists were even worse than what I came up with, did I have a clue I needed to end that revolving door situationship that she labeled. Yes, she called it, and I thought it was funny the first time I heard it.
Several times, she would do things that made me hit the roof, then put me on speakerphone for her family to hear my anger. I'm sure they had no idea why I was like that and I bet she told them lies. Why tell me I was on speaker? The games she played were mind-boggling. I was always the bad guy for reacting to her abuse, including her attempts to get to my bank accounts. Through manipulation, she drained everything anyway and put me in bankruptcy. Never caring about that at all.
I won't tell my story, but I will say that I now know this is probably the worst mental illness there is. There is no cure, and even if there was, narcissists wouldn't take it, follow it, or seek serious therapy. They are always playing victim 100% of the time.